AsiaLIFE

Having a baby was far from my mind when I first moved to Phnom Penh. Work, travel and fun were on the agenda – and not necessarily in that order. First Friday parties, drinks at Rubies and debauched nights at the Heart were fully embraced during our first year in Cambodia’s capital. There were people to meet, friends to be made and many a happy hour cocktail to imbibe. Something about Phnom Penh inspires a ‘party like there’s no tomorrow’ attitude in many, and we found ourselves intoxicated with our new expat lifestyle. Eventually, we came to the realisation that a perpetual hangover was not an ideal state to be in. A life change was in order. It was time to settle down, be responsible and perhaps make the hardest decision you can ever make – to have a baby.

Pregnant in the Penh

 

A short time and several home pregnancy tests from U-Care later, I found myself pregnant in the Penh. So now what? Aside from swapping the cocktails for mocktails, I embarked on a mission to discover what the city had to offer in terms of pre-natal care. Other than joining a highly beneficial pre-natal yoga class, the most important step was finding a good doctor. Taking the advice of other mothers I started seeing Dr Laura Watson at SOS. The monthly appointments that ensued checked that everything was progressing as it should be. They also offered an opportunity to discuss what was going on with my changing body and the new life inside it.

 

I was inspired with confidence that I was in good medical hands – though I soon found out that SOS (and apparently, every other medical establishment in the city) were unable to perform the two more detailed ultrasounds pregnant women routinely get to check on the baby’s development. Trips to Bangkok were necessary to undergo a nuchal scan – an ultrasound looking for certain signs indicating that the foetus could have Downs Syndrome – typically undertaken at around 14 weeks into the pregnancy. At around 22 weeks another Bangkok visit was needed for a detailed scan to establish that the baby’s organs and other body parts were developing, and to check for various birth defects. For these appointments I opted to visit Samitivej Hospital, an establishment well patronised by Phnom Penh expats and with a reputation for excellence in all matters maternal.

‘Which Do You Prefer, Boy or Girl?!’

 

Medical matters aside, I soon came to discover that being pregnant in Phnom Penh attracted much attention from Khmers. Inevitable cultural differences were revealed in conversations I was to have over and over again. The “how many months?” question, once answered, was most often met with a very frank comment on my body shape and size, and I was usually scolded for being ‘too small!’ (This despite the fact I ended up giving birth to a 3.3kg baby.) I guess I should be flattered, considering most barangs are chastised for being overweight.

 

The other obsession amongst Khmers was the sex of the baby. We chose not to find out the sex in advance, the admission of which was met by most Khmers with a look of incomprehension. “But haven’t you seen a doctor?” they would ask as though I wasn’t quite of sound mind. “Which do you prefer, boy or girl?” quickly followed. I still haven’t quite established what the correct answer to this one should have been. The most fascinating pregnancy talk revolved around old wives tales. Whether I preferred sweet or sour foods was apparently indicative of the baby’s sex. I preferred sweet – so that meant I was having a girl – one Khmer friend stood their baby on my stomach to see which leg it raised. Again, it revealed I was carrying a girl. Meanwhile, western friends shared some beliefs of their own, and their common theory was that I was having a boy due to a low sitting bump and that I hadn’t appeared to put on weight on my face. Funnily enough, I ended up having a girl – perhaps there’s more truth in Khmer beliefs than we care to realise.

Bangkok Bound

 

For the birth itself, a decision had to be made about where to go. Option one was to stay in Phnom Penh and give birth in a local maternity clinic or Calmette Hospital. Neither was recommended by SOS due to a supposed lack of equipment to deal with any emergency that could arise. The new Royal Rattanak Hospital in Tuol Kork could have been an option, though it had just opened at this point so its reputation was not yet established. We then weighed up whether to go to Bangkok to one of its well-regarded international hospitals or to fly home to Australia. We chose Bangkok as it was closer, cheaper to fly to and better suited to my husband travelling back and forth to Phnom Penh for work. As I’d already had the aforementioned ultrasounds at Samitivej Hospital this was also where I felt comfortable giving birth, though some people prefer Bumrungrad – the behemoth of Bangkok medical institutions.

At 36 weeks pregnant (the latest most airlines let you fly) I departed Phnom Penh, first having to produce a letter from the doctor at check-in after the staff looked me up and down and queried my due date. In Bangkok we stayed conveniently close to Samitivej Hospital at Tropical Residence, a comfortable serviced apartment complex with a pool, gym, and even a complimentary tuk-tuk service to the nearby shops, cafés and Skytrain stop.

And Baby Makes Three

 

The big day finally arrived and without going into the gory details, our daughter Zara Mae arrived. Let’s just say that that the birth involved 15 hours of labour followed by an unplanned emergency caesarean - a double whammy - with a six-night hospital stay in order to recover. Aside from the pain, sleeplessness and demands of a newborn, the hospital experience was excellent – from the kind staff to the facilities to the fact you could dial up some dim sum or order Starbucks to your room. Upon leaving they even loaded us up with all sorts of baby presents courtesy of the hospital.

 

We eventually returned to Phnom Penh after a long and arduous wait of nearly a month for Zara’s birth certificate, Australian citizenship and Australian passport to be processed. We were then barraged with questions on the baby’s sex, age, appearance and size once more – though this time with even greater enthusiasm. Seven weeks on, life in Phnom Penh with a baby is tiring yet manageable, even veering towards enjoyable during instances that don’t involve crying frenzies or projectile bodily fluids. Babies and children are loved and accepted here, and we’ve found that it’s no big deal to bring the baby along when eating out. We’re thankful we can still go out and about and have dinner with friends, though our new lifestyle is not exactly conducive to pulling an all-nighter on Street 51 anymore. And that’s just fine with us.

Useful Links:

 

Medical

Samitivej Hospital (Bangkok)
http://www.samitivej.co.th/sukhumvit/womens_health_center_en.aspx
Bumrungrad Hospital (Bangkok)
http://www.bumrungrad.com/overseas-medical-care/medical-services/clinics-and-centers/women-s-center.aspx
SOS (Phnom Penh)
http://www.internationalsos.com/en/ourresources_clinics_cambodia_35.htm

Baby Advice and Forums

 

Cambodia Parents Network
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/cambodiaparentnetwork/
Essential Baby
http://www.essentialbaby.com.au/
BabyCentre
http://www.babycentre.co.uk/pregnancy